Saturday, June 04, 2005
Snippets from our day
I was trying to get ready for a luncheon today when I heard banging sounds from the direction of the kitchen. When I walked in, both boys were sitting on the island soaked to the skin. The kitchen was bathed in milk--the island, the fronts of the cabinets, the plastic containers and bowls and sippy cups inside the cabinets, the floor, the refrigerator door, the bar stools, my calendar, a couple of magazines, a stack of paperwork, and the entire contents of my "junk drawer." A gallon carton lay empty on the floor. Max was holding a cup of milk filled almost to the brim, with two icecubes floating on top.
-What happened, Max?
-Boo did it.
-He did what, Max?
-He poured out the milk.
-How did Boo get the milk carton, Max?
-I got it out of the refrigerator.
-Max, this is the reason I don't want you to get things out of the refrigerator by yourself. Boo doesn't understand how to keep things from spilling, and the two of you have created a huge mess. I'm trying to get ready to go out, and now I've got to clean all of this up. I'm really frustrated with you.
-But do you want to know why I got it out of the refrigerator?
-Why?
-So that I could have a nice tall glass of cold milk.
Oh. That changes everything.
*****
Max was playing with the salt shaker at dinner this evening.
-I want to take this home, mommy.
-So I can put it in my pool.
-Why do you want to put salt in the swimming pool?
-So that I can float.
-What do you mean, Max?
-Well, did you know that if there's salt in water, you can float in it, but if there's no salt in water, then you sink?
I guess he's been studying the Dead Sea in his spare time.
*****
Max turned up his increasingly-finnicky nose at the tortellini that was served at dinner. On the way home from the restaurant, he began to look for something more to his liking:
Max: I want ice cream.
Me: Well, you're in luck because we have some in the freezer.
Max: I want it in a cone.
Me: All we have is ice cream sandwiches.
Max: Yuck. I don't like those.
Lee: An ice cream sandwich is like two pieces of chocolate cake with ice cream inside. It's the best of both worlds.
Max: Well, in that case, maybe I should give it a try.
*****
Boo seems to have entered a brand new bedtime phase that involves a good deal of screaming before exhausting himself to sleep. Or he's cutting a new molar, or perhaps has a bit of a bug coming on. In any event, he's been highly agitated for several nights running. That'll teach me to brag about what a good little sleeper he is.
As I was trying to sooth him in the rocker, Max showed up. This is a gigantic No No in our house. Max's company is always a stimulant, particularly for Boo. But Max persisted despite my demand that he leave the room and shut the door behind him. "I need to sing Boo a lullaby." And he offered his own personal favorite, sung to the tune of the ABC song:
"Ant, Bear, Cat, Dog, Elephant, Frog, Giraffe
Horse, Iguana, Jaguar, Kangaroo, Lion, Mouse
Nightingale, Octopus, Pig
Quetzel, Rhinocerous, Snake
Turtle, Umbrella bird, Vulture, Whale
X-Ray fish, Yak and Zebra
Now I know my animal ABC's
Next time won't you sing with me."
He kissed Boo on the head and turned to leave.
"Thank you, Max. That was very sweet of you."
"No, mommy, thank you."
*****
For over an hour, Max has been resisting my efforts to get him to bed. I finally joined him on the floor and watched him in earnest. He was trying to figure out how to hang a toy monkey from a palm tree so that its feet didn't touch the ground and the tree didn't topple over. After experimenting with numerous angles, Max was increasingly frustrated. He asked me to give it a go, and after several unsuccessful attempts, I found a solution. We lay on the floor for a few minutes, dangling monkey between us, grinning at each other and our accomplishment. Then I announced that it was time for bed.
-Mommy, I want to be nocturnal.
-What do you mean, Max?
-I want to stay up all night and sleep during the day.
What on earth am I going to do with this boy?
-What happened, Max?
-Boo did it.
-He did what, Max?
-He poured out the milk.
-How did Boo get the milk carton, Max?
-I got it out of the refrigerator.
-Max, this is the reason I don't want you to get things out of the refrigerator by yourself. Boo doesn't understand how to keep things from spilling, and the two of you have created a huge mess. I'm trying to get ready to go out, and now I've got to clean all of this up. I'm really frustrated with you.
-But do you want to know why I got it out of the refrigerator?
-Why?
-So that I could have a nice tall glass of cold milk.
Oh. That changes everything.
*****
Max was playing with the salt shaker at dinner this evening.
-I want to take this home, mommy.
-So I can put it in my pool.
-Why do you want to put salt in the swimming pool?
-So that I can float.
-What do you mean, Max?
-Well, did you know that if there's salt in water, you can float in it, but if there's no salt in water, then you sink?
I guess he's been studying the Dead Sea in his spare time.
*****
Max turned up his increasingly-finnicky nose at the tortellini that was served at dinner. On the way home from the restaurant, he began to look for something more to his liking:
Max: I want ice cream.
Me: Well, you're in luck because we have some in the freezer.
Max: I want it in a cone.
Me: All we have is ice cream sandwiches.
Max: Yuck. I don't like those.
Lee: An ice cream sandwich is like two pieces of chocolate cake with ice cream inside. It's the best of both worlds.
Max: Well, in that case, maybe I should give it a try.
*****
Boo seems to have entered a brand new bedtime phase that involves a good deal of screaming before exhausting himself to sleep. Or he's cutting a new molar, or perhaps has a bit of a bug coming on. In any event, he's been highly agitated for several nights running. That'll teach me to brag about what a good little sleeper he is.
As I was trying to sooth him in the rocker, Max showed up. This is a gigantic No No in our house. Max's company is always a stimulant, particularly for Boo. But Max persisted despite my demand that he leave the room and shut the door behind him. "I need to sing Boo a lullaby." And he offered his own personal favorite, sung to the tune of the ABC song:
"Ant, Bear, Cat, Dog, Elephant, Frog, Giraffe
Horse, Iguana, Jaguar, Kangaroo, Lion, Mouse
Nightingale, Octopus, Pig
Quetzel, Rhinocerous, Snake
Turtle, Umbrella bird, Vulture, Whale
X-Ray fish, Yak and Zebra
Now I know my animal ABC's
Next time won't you sing with me."
He kissed Boo on the head and turned to leave.
"Thank you, Max. That was very sweet of you."
"No, mommy, thank you."
*****
For over an hour, Max has been resisting my efforts to get him to bed. I finally joined him on the floor and watched him in earnest. He was trying to figure out how to hang a toy monkey from a palm tree so that its feet didn't touch the ground and the tree didn't topple over. After experimenting with numerous angles, Max was increasingly frustrated. He asked me to give it a go, and after several unsuccessful attempts, I found a solution. We lay on the floor for a few minutes, dangling monkey between us, grinning at each other and our accomplishment. Then I announced that it was time for bed.
-Mommy, I want to be nocturnal.
-What do you mean, Max?
-I want to stay up all night and sleep during the day.
What on earth am I going to do with this boy?
4 Comments:
What are you going to do? You are going to continue to write hilarious stories about Max and Boo's adventures and misadventures to help you keep your sanity and your sense of humor. Then when Max reaches a stage that he ceases to communicate with parents, you can reread them and remember these days fondly. Hang in there. Love you, Barbie
I wish you had a motion-sensitive video camera in the kitchen; I'd love to see exactly how the milk scene played out! And sorry you had to clean it up.
I have a diversion for you, if you're willing to play.
Gee, first you don't know what "after" means, and then you don't know what "nocturnal" means? You seem to be having problems with your vocabulary. ;-)
Lucky for me, I have Max to help me out.
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